I feel bad. I’ve read 99% of Kate’s blog posts in that time (I subscribe by email something you can do here too if you want?! #jussayin). I’ve read loads of the other Groovy Mums blog posts and I’ve been motivated, inspired and moved. One in particular I’m in awe of more and more every time she writes – Glasgow Mummy. What an amazing woman. I still think of Sarah every morning when I jump out of bed and head to the kitchen to have a small mouthful of something to “kick start my metabolism”. She has been a huge health and fitness inspiration to me. It’s mad that isn’t it? I think of someone every morning who I’ve never actually met. All because I read her blog.
Anyway, I digress. The reason, no sorry, the big fat excuse for me not contributing is that honestly I’ve been soooooo busy… Wait for it…. GETTING MY GROOVE BACK!!!!
Pass the Stilton.
Yes, cheesy and cliched but very true.
OK, so I didn’t start getting my groove back for a couple of months after the last post because I was busy heading back to the day job after 11 months of maternity leave. Wow! What a shock to the system! Jeez how hard is it to get yourself AND a toddler washed, fed, watered, dressed and out the door in time for work?! The amount of times I had smeared toothpaste on my trousers or Ready Brek in my hair in those first couple of months was ridiculous. I felt like I was drowning. It was horrible. All this constant responsibility on my shoulders. I felt like I was only half doing everything in my life and I was crap at it all. Crap Mum, crap Wife, crap cook, crap cleaner, crap dog owner, and the one thing that REALLY got to me – crap employee. You ask anyone who knows me and I’ve spent the whole of my adult life being a workaholic. Suddenly having this thing in my life, my son, my baby, my flesh and blood, was far more important than writing scripts, meeting deadlines and hitting targets. For the first time ever, work has come second. “Hooray!” cheer my friends and family. But it unnerves me. I feel rubbish. I’m nowhere near as good at my job as I was and I feel like I am letting my colleagues down a lot. I’m very lucky, my colleagues are genuinely my friends and my immediate team are some of the most wonderful, beautiful, talented, organised and understanding women I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing. I 100% love going to work. We’ve just moved offices and it’s amazing how much of a difference it has made being somewhere bright and airy. Here’s me and the nicest guy you’ll ever meet, my colleague Dave, enjoying our new office view!
Alas, I’m pleased to report that a lot of the madness and stress that had been going on has stopped and things finally feel like they’re slotting into place. It takes me 45 minutes now to sort Blake out compared to 2 hours when I first went back! Both work and the morning routine have become easier. As have most areas of my life. I feel mental clarity I haven’t felt for a long time. The immense weight of constant responsibility seems lighter somewhat as my husband has started to pitch in a lot more. I’m looking in the mirror and liking what I see; inside and out.
So, what’s causing this change? What’s the big secret?…
The secret is… I’m looking after my body. And in turn, it’s looking after me.
I turned 30 in November and Shaun bought me a spa day as a gift. It was for me to go on my own. A few of my friends thought I was mad going alone and some offered to come with me. Not surprisingly, the friends that offered to help relieve my loneliness are not mothers yet. They’re yet to learn just how much you miss your solitary relaxed time.
Sitting in a giant hot tub with aromatherapy oils stinging my nose for a whole hour by myself was pure bliss. The first 20 minutes my mind did the familiar ‘Mother’s race’ where it seems to whirl and whizz with all the little things you need to do;
“did I sort childcare for the weekend? God I need to go food shopping! What can we have for tea? I hope Shaun’s feeding Blake healthy stuff. Did I leave enough nappies in the change bag? Did I put the washing machine on? Don’t forget Nana’s birthday! Must ring Beccy back” etc etc.
Soon, after the whizzing mind had slowed down and I sank into the hot bubbles, I felt something I hadn’t in over a year – boredom. Complete and utter boredom. Oh my! How I had missed this feeling! My old friend boredom, who came back to me that day for 40 minutes and allowed me to completely sort my life out. It was an epiphany. I had strong words with myself and kind of did a bit of self therapy; realising a lot of my unhappiness was coming down to the fact I was overweight, unorganised, shattered and miserable. It’s like a light switch flicked inside me that day and ever since I’ve vowed to look after this now 30 year old body of mine. I’m definitely not getting any younger!
I am pleased to report that down to changing my eating habits I now ‘eat clean‘ which means 5-6 small meals a day full of fresh, natural, organic produce. I’ve stopped drinking milk because I always find this affects my skin, bloats me and makes me lethargic. I don’t like to use the word ‘diet’ because I’m not on one. I eat healthy and choose well and so far, I haven’t feel the urge to binge or eat crap. In turn it’s meant that my body is rapidly changing. I’m feeling strong and fit, running and walking an average of 20-25km a week. I’ve entered myself into a 10K and the Liverpool half marathon in the next 8 weeks. I’ve lost 18lbs so far and more inches than I’ve noted down. I feel FANTASTIC!
I feel like a Groovy Mum.
So here I am proving that if I can do it, any Mum can.
In the last few weeks, I’ve been asked quite a lot just how I manage to fit it all in. Do you know what the main thing has been? I have stopped watching TV at night. Seriously. I’ve never been a fan of the soaps or anything but we’d think nothing of sitting down with some sugary treats, flicking between the channels. I worked out we were wasting a good 15+hours a week doing this. For what? Repeats of Top Gear on Dave? (For that’s all we seemed to catch!). These days, we might catch a bit of one of those juicy Channel 4 documentaries before bed but that’s it as far as TV time goes. My time in the evenings is spent playing with Blake, cooking dinner, cooking and preparing lunch for the next day, running with the dog, doing a spot of weights in the garage, chores and then bed. I do miss relaxing in front of the tellybox but the happiness and organisation that’s come from feeling like I have more time in my life outweighs the desire to waste time watching benign rubbish every night. Plus, on my rest days from exercise we’ll make sure we cuddle up and catch a film together which makes up for channel flicking and idly watching anything and everything most nights.
So, back to Kate and the Groovy Mums.
Every week as part of the Groovy Mum blog hop, Kate writes some prompts for us all which are great for getting you thinking. It’s inspiring to read the other Groovy Mums and what they say to these prompts so make sure you check them out too.
Here we’re Kate’s prompts this week:
1. Body – How are you sleeping? Do you qualify as sleep-deprived? Are you a mum to a baby who just isn’t sleeping through yet? What toll is that taking? Do you have older children creeping into bed with you? What does your bed look like? Is it comfortable and supportive enough? Could you give your bed a makeover in some way perhaps with scented pillows or a colourful bedspread? Could you have a nap at some point in the day? How can you ensure you get better quality sleep?
I don’t sleep enough and I know I don’t. I generally go to bed between midnight and 1am which isn’t good when my alarm goes off at 5:45am. I think doing breakfast radio for so many years meant my body did adapt to little sleep and I do function OK. My husband may disagree though as I have crashed the car into a lamp post and locked both Blake and the keys in the car (this week!) when knackered.
2. Mind – Our children have reward charts and get stickers when they do well? Could you play with this idea and create your own chart or adapt a child’s one? What are those things that you know you should do but don’t seem to get around to? How can you motivate yourself? In my continuous attempt to get mums to say good things about themselves, why not tell me what you deserve a reward for?
I have a little list running all the time on my iPad of stuff that needs doing. I was being stupid and trying to attempt too many things all at once. It was becoming daunting and I got to the point where I wasn’t doing anything at all! My Sister was feeling the same and her Hubster had a bit of a go and forced her to scale down the list, attempting to achieve little and often. It does work! Don’t set yourself too high a target and it does seem easier to achieve.
If I were to get a reward it would be for juggling so many responsibilities and I would share this award with all Mums!
3. Spirit – Is the spirit willing? You can respond to this one in whatever way you see fit.
The only spirits willing are Vodka and Sambuca which I will be attempting to avoid at all costs this weekend on a much needed girly spa break (can’t wait!).
4. Blog – Have you attended a blogger event? Have you met any bloggers in the flesh? Would you like to do? Why is that? I am speaking at Britmums Live so I hope some of my lovely Groovy Mums will be there to hold my hand.
My blog needs some attention. I need to make more time for it. I would love to go to Britmums live, I think I need to buy my ticket as I would love to meet other Mum bloggers.
5. It is the creator of Winnie the Pooh’s birthday this week. So, as a bit of fun, why not work out which Winnie the Pooh character you are most like and why? It might help you to discover what is great about you and also the things that you could usefully change.
I am most definitely Tigger. Arguably my friends would probably say a hundred Tiggers, bouncing everywhere!
6. The Big Question – How is your sex life? Oh, I know we are not supposed to talk about religion, sex and politics but you know me, I like breaking the rules. So how are things in the bedroom (or your venue of choice)? Has sex become a chore? Do you find it difficult to make time for sex? Are you too exhausted for sex? Have you managed to spice up your love-life? Be brave and reveal all on your blog or just do some quiet reflecting on this issue.
I’m not answering this. Sore point.
Are you a Groovy Mum? Have you got a blog? Then join us!
If you want to be clear on what Groovy Mums is and how YOU can get involved read this http://kateonthinice.wordpress.com/how-to-be-a-groovy-mum/